Another week, another Married at First Sight commitment ceremony. This week we open with Bryce telling his long-suffering wife Melissa that everything bad that has ever happened to him is somehow not his fault.
He’s ranting about Bec and the rumour of his secret girlfriend. Melissa doesn’t say much, but when speaking about his behaviour at the dinner party, she adds that “you weren’t bad, but I definitely moved your water glass away.” Golden.
She also says that “We don’t argue, and I feel that’s because when it comes to something that upsets me, I don’t bring it up because I’m scared about what will happen. I’m scared Bryce will leave,” which is distinctly less golden.
Belinda and Patrick are first up, and before they both predictably decide to stay, Mel brings up their teamwork when James called Belinda “frigid”.
“I hate that word,” says Belinda. “I felt like it crushed my progress because I was just so insulted and so offended by it.”
“So were we,” says Alessandra.
Ever helpful, James jumps in with “I’m sorry, but” and starts talking about how “I’ve got a lot of respect for females and their rights and what have you.” Thanks, James. Equality has been achieved off the back of your actions, and what have you.
Both Booka/Brett and Liam/Georgia choose to stay.
Bec and Jake seem happier than they’ve been, probably because Bec has stopped with her brick wall act, and they both stay.
Alana and Jason have apparently stopped having sex for long enough to actually talk to once another, and the prognosis isn’t good.
“We’ve had the best week. I don’t know if I’ve done something to stop Alana’s nagging, or she’s consciously done it, but I’ve enjoyed it,” Jason says, which is a great start.
After some uncomfortable silence, the pair admit they have different sex drives, and that the spark might not be there anymore. They both stay though.
Johnny and Kerry seem far too happy for anybody partaking in this nightmare, and choose to stay even though Kerry says she’s giving Johnny “blue balls.”
Fellow newcomers Chris and Jaimie aren’t so happy. Chris is stoked with Jaimie, but she’s concerned that he’d a FIFO worker who didn’t go to uni, and also seems really hung up on his “Queensland haircut.” They stay, but I don’t predict for long.
The two biggest trainwreck couples have been saved for last obviously, with Jo and James next up on the couch. After apologising for his god-awful “joke” last week, James starts on about how good this week has been, and how he’s been lowering his walls. Jo cuts in with the very succinct “You are full of shit. Will you just stop your shit.”
“He makes you second guess the truth that you know.” she adds.
John Aiken says probably the first useful thing he’s said all season, and calls James a gaslighter.
“This is classic, stereotypical gaslighting behaviour, and it’s something that has to stop. That behaviour is gaslighting, and it is toxic, and it hurts people that are close to you.”
Both choose to leave, thank Christ.
Lastly, Bryce and Melissa take to the couch. Bryce again tells us why all of this drama isn’t actually his fault, Bec is to blame, and he is 100% innocent for telling Bec he thought she was the hottest and then talking about his secret girlfriend to her.
John asks Melissa how the drama has been affecting her.
“It’s embarrassing for me,” she admits, to which Bryce the absolute brick says “I don’t think it’s embarrassing for you.”
When asked what she thinks about the rumours, Melissa says, “I don’t listen to anyone else. I only listen to him,” and girl, GET OUT.
But the red flags keep coming. “I’ve never told anybody this, but I have this intense fear of losing people. And I don’t want to lose him,” Melissa says. “I don’t want to voice how I actually feel. I don’t want Bryce to get on the defence, and he writes ‘leave’.”
Everybody’s favourite victim, Bryce, says that “My behaviour is being caused by other people instigating things, not me,” and I’m so close to smacking my head against the wall that it’s unbelievable.
They both stay for reasons which will forever remain above my comprehension.