Despite becoming arguably crappier per episode, Riverdale’s fourth season continues to captivate audiences across the globe. We’ve assigned twelve Riverdale characters to the zodiac signs because, well, why not?
Aries: Archie Andrews
Archie, the hunky red-headed protagonist of the series, is inarguably strong and courageous. He’s hard to push around and has a passion for projects that improve the welfare of Riverdale, such as the community centre he is currently attempting to create at his gym. Archie, as befits an Aries, is also intensely loyal to his friends and his partner, Veronica (despite that scandalous smooch with Betty in season two. Whoops).
Taurus: Josie McCoy
Josie, the spunky lead singer of Josie and the Pussycats, values loyalty above all else. She also has a strong affinity for the arts and values the quality of her family life. Josie is sociable yet obstinate – so don’t push that loyalty.
Gemini: Veronica Lodge
Veronica Lodge, the “raven-haired vixen” of the series, has the cleverness (and slyness) of the typical Gemini. She is exceedingly determined, stubborn and a capable businesswoman (and her success comes in handy, as she loves to shop) – even at her modest age. She also has a sharp tongue capable of causing immense damage.
Cancer: Betty Cooper
Emotional, feminine and a little shy at times, Betty Cooper is Riverdale’s quintessential Cancer. Cancerians tend to grow up too quickly (often as a result of situations out of their control) and Betty is no different. From her sister being sent away in season one to her Dad being revealed as a serial killer in season two (and murdered in front of her in season three), Betty’s child-like wonder in the pilot episode is long gone.
Leo: Fred Andrews
Fred Andrews, before his tragic onscreen death at the beginning of season four, was a “get the job done” guy, and a terrific Dad. Fred was a very capable and reliable guy; warm-hearted and kind to a fault, he captured everything that makes IRL Leos so special.
Virgo: FP Jones
Virgos tend to mistake their priorities. More so than other signs, they have the potential to neglect their families in favour of their work, even if this is unintentional. Although FP Jones has pulled himself together over the course of the series and is now a fab dad and the town sheriff, he definitely neglected his family early in the series.
Libra: Jughead Jones
Oh-so-cool and a little detached (in a ruggedly handsome way), Jughead Jones is super quirky and very creative. He has a strong need for justice; even his introversion doesn’t hold him back from fighting the authorities for what is right.
Scorpio: Cheryl Blossom
Cheryl Blossom certainly has a sting to her. Despite being quite closed off and vulnerable following her twin’s death and father’s suicide in season one, she’ll go to the end of the world if it means hiding that from the other characters. She’s ridiculously moody, loves being in the limelight and is sporadically selfish. For God’s sake, she introduces herself as “Cheryl ‘Bombshell’ Blossom”. But we can’t help but love her anyway.
Sagittarius: Penelope Blossom
Penelope Blossom is one of the more fucked-up characters on Riverdale – and that’s saying something. Adopted by the Blossoms at a young age and being groomed to marry her adopted brother undoubtedly took its toll on Penelope. She’s exceedingly clever and very active; Sagittarius traits that help her in her serial killing glories.
Capricorn: Hiram Lodge
Hiram Lodge is literally invincible. He’s as crooked as they come, but his Capricorn-esque resilience, drive and ambition just keep him coming back. He’s a gifted (albeit evil) businessman and his smooth-talking ability only pushes his scams along.
Aquarius: Toni Topaz
Toni is confident, full of ideas and a capable leader – remember her gang, the Pretty Poisons? She’s also surprisingly caring, which comes in handy when dealing with the many moods of her partner, Cheryl.
Pisces: Kevin Keller
Pisces are the true parents of the zodiac in the best way possible. Kevin can’t help himself; he always jumps in to assist Betty and the gang with whatever strife they’ve unravelled for themselves. Whether it’s going undercover into a cult or attending dangerous meetings in the woods, Kevin is there to do Betty’s bidding.
Do you agree with our Riverdale/astrology matches? Let us know in the comments below!