When preparing for a first date, you’re most likely going to ask a trusted friend, or Google, for some solid dating tips. You’re praying you won’t receive the crappy advice you hear from noughties rom-coms and chick flicks: “Wait three days to text back”, “don’t have sex until the fifth date”, “the guy should always pay”; the list is just as outdated as it is endless. When comparing our all-time favourite chick flicks from the 2000’s that ‘taught’ us what makes or breaks a relationship, we now realise these dating rules are now just so 2007:
The three-day rule
The three day rule is basically either person waiting three days to call, text, email or Tinder message, after the first official rendezvous. Why? You’ll look too keen if you message earlier than three days. What’s wrong with that? I honestly do not know. Of course coming off too eager isn’t fantastic for either party, however no one wants to wait around for someone they barely know for three whole days. In 2018, not speaking for three days means you’re officially ghosting them. Although rom-coms have mentioned the three-day rule to death, The Holiday shows the other side of this rule. The undertone of the rule is ‘waiting around for the other person to make the next move.’ Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz decide not to wait around; they take action. They both set themselves free from their broken relationships and open themselves to something new, ultimately leaving Cameron with a very sexy Jude Law and Kate staying in a dream mansion. Take notes, people! Don’t wait around, not even for three days.
Wait *insert number* dates before sex
Well, Samantha from Sex and the City would tell all of you to go fuck yourselves if you said to wait a certain number of dates before sex. As we’ve learned from our own experiences, or the unfolding of horrible dates in chick flicks, waiting a set number of dates for sex is actually quite odd. Sex is a personal choice between two people. If you’re both horny and don’t mind exchanging more than just words on the first date, no one is stopping you. If you both want to wait a while, then take things slow. Go by Samantha’s mantra: “I will not be judged by you or society.”
You can’t date more than one person at a time
Yes, you can. If you’re not exclusive, you’re technically allowed to see whoever you please. It can be dick-headish to see more than one person after you start dating someone for a while, but the choice is yours. Take the oh-so sexy – and incredibly indecisive – Ryan Reynolds as an example from Definitely, Maybe. He was dating different women at the same time and he was trying to understand who the right person was for him. Yes, he was a bit of a ‘slut,’ as his daughter would put it, but the course of action led him to be with the right woman. Don’t you ever wonder ‘What if?’ Well, you won’t have to if you give people a chance when you’re single and dating – there’s no need to hold back.
The man should initiate
In a world where equality is a top priority, it’s strange to believe this dating rule is taking so long to shake off. Perhaps we can blame preconditioning? However, it’s time for women to take a leap of faith and ask the guy out if that’s what they’re waiting around for. This is normally when Samantha Jones would be an amazing example of this, however She’s The Man is another great example of this. Besides being one of the greatest feminist-friendly rom-coms of all time, almost all of the female characters initiate or confess their feelings to whoever they’re pining after. This characterisation and ‘plot twist’ flaunts just how liberating it is to be in control, as a woman, when initiating a date.
Can you believe that being intelligent might actually be sexy? The airy-fairy persona is getting old, and TBH it’s not an attractive quality. Mean Girls taught us well that playing dumb gets you nowhere. Lindsay Lohan’s bright, yet clueless character, Cady, pretends to be failing maths with the agenda to be ‘tutored’ by her crush, Aaron Samuels. Of course, it all goes wrong and he doesn’t actually fall for her (properly) until she breaks down and realises that she should only be herself. A vital life lesson – playing dumb isn’t cute; if you want to amaze someone then be your true, intelligent self.